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He wanted to jump start his life, so he looked through a bunch of adventure holiday brochures. He ruled out whitewater rafting because of his inner ear disorder. Safaris were out due to allergies. He decided (despite his claustrophobia) to go spelunking. He sang this song as he went spelunking. 'A-spelunking o we go, a spelunking o we go, O I once did see a man, a spelunking was this man, he spelunked over here, he spelunked over there, o he was spelunking crazy, & preferred to be called daisy' and so on. Granny came out for a knees-up, but the dirty old flirt wasn't wearing any bloomers. Everyone was treated to another of granny's increasingly frequent full moons. Grandad elected to fully through with a golden shower and a bag full of nickels. Shiny nickels. And the occasional button. Damn cheap communist bastards. He swore he'd tear them limb from limb and feed them to his tortoise.
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