goat

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I was kicking back and relaxing with the latest issue of Big'uns magazine when I realized I was out of quarters and the bed stopped vibrating. That's when I tried to lecture Dog the Bounty Hunter about his use of racial epithets. That's when HE pepper-sprayed me and I lost the use of my vision for more than two minutes. It was that damn gunk that the optometrist had stuck in my eye! Everything seemed excruciatingly bright. I decided to squint my way to the bathroom, hoping I don't have to resort to plugging myself to stem the tide of the inevitable.
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