Once upon a time there were three iguanas. The first iguana...

stories

Once upon a time there were three iguanas. The first iguana... had a deep green tint to it's thick skin and the other two we're pink. Yes thats right Mr Kawisaki had genetically deformed pink iguanas and this was teh talk of the town and a talking town is sure sign of drug abuse, I should know, my garage told me last night as I leant against it puking up my methodone and magic-mushroom soup... It then told me to paint myself purple and rob old ladies as they waited at bus tops Because, to be frank - BUS STOPS were just too common an occurrence to waste any time being seen near too. This reminds me of the first time I went on a bus, and I tried to pay with a ten pound note, and the driver looked at me and said "Are you serious? No I'm fucking hilarious he shouted at the top of his voice, ripped off his bishop's robes and revealed his stockings, suspenders and a rather fetching lace bra that he was wearing underneath. The Tennessee policemen were unimpressed. In their mirror glasses he saw his doom- years later he was rescued from a pig shed by animal rights activists, but by then he could only squeal whilst on all fours, eat offal and tapdance for the toilet. A shame.